Geography Cannot Stop Spoonies From Finding Each Other

Moongazer commented recently that it doesn’t matter where we are geographically, we spoonies can still find and comfort each other no matter where in the world we are, and I couldn’t agree with her more.

In fact, getting to network with people who live with and work around other health systems is beneficial to all of us. We all need to know what specific problems our spoonie friends in other countries have to face. None of us should have to fight the system alone. Ever. Together we can solve complex problems within our healthcare systems, but it takes a lot of networking and a willingness to learn what others are up against, especially in countries where it is very hard to have an invisible illness. I know it’s hard everywhere, but I also realize that I am extremely lucky to live in the US, even if it means I have to wait five years for disability to be approved, and my healthcare kinda sucks, and my pills are extremely expensive and the treatments that will most benefit me are either non-FDA approved (read: EXPENSIVE and hard to find and makes you look suspicious on your medical record), or they are off limits because of this crazed witch hunt involving chronic pain patients and opiate use. A topic for many more blog posts, for sure, but not the topic of this post.

Bottom line, others have it harder than I do by far. I don’t just mean that others are in more pain or have more broken bodies than mine, although that is also very true. I do mean that many fellow spoonies have no roof over their head, no access to the internet, no support networks, no disability to even try filing for, no access to any treatment or meds, and often no access to diagnostics either. The minor annoyances in my life, like not being taken seriously, is a major roadblock for someone who still needs a diagnosis, still needs at least one doctor to take them seriously and at least try to help them. What about places where new chronic pain research has not been circulated? So much of our knowledge of where the pain comes from and how real it is have changed, but without the benefit of that knowledge, many suffer inhumane hospitalizations for psychiatric disorders they do not have.

Moongazer’s sweet comment also reminded me of how my psychiatrist asked me if I knew where my blogging family lived and I looked at her like she was the crazy one, but the question also caught me off guard; I felt suddenly so defensive of all of you. We are not some mass hysteria, thinking everything is a conspiracy and no one in real life understands us. Instead it is more like huddling together for warmth with people I am actually proud to call my family, only on the internet. It is a chance to read about others who handle pain differently, to get to know them through their clever words and their important stories. It is a chance to comfort those who are newer to the chronic pain community, and reach out to people who I have admired as writers for years. Who could pass that up? Not I!

Why does it even matter? I have friends that live right down the block that I talk to way less than you guys! I also talk to my family less than I talk to fellow spoonies. I don’t mean for that to sound sad or complainer-y, but just that it is so amazing to have contact with a vast array of talented, witty, and inspirational individuals who do not force me to justify myself and who accept me as I hope to learn to accept myself.

I was very lonely, I won’t debate that, but I didn’t come here specifically to meet new friends. In fact, I thought I would be the worst whiner, off in the corner, unable to meet anyone because I was too bitter and angry. Being around people who understand has washed away the empty, bitter angriness, and replaced it with joy and determination. That is what my blogging family means to me, and so much more. I am beyond grateful for your support, patience, and kindness as I work through things that many of you have figured out long ago. It is such an honor to be allowed to learn from and reach out to others who live with chronic illness or chronic pain, and to see firsthand how strong we truly are together. ❤ ❤ ❤

Though I have to admit, now that I’ve been asked, I am curious as to how far apart we are spread. I would love to know what state or country everyone is from! I’m a proud resident of Oregon. The Pacific Northwest is beautiful and won’t let me leave for too long, though I’ve lived in Massachusetts and Indiana as well. I was born here and I love this state!

Drop me a quick comment and let me know where you live, I can’t wait to see where we all are from.

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About Jessi Finds Out Fibro

Hi, and thank you for finding your way to my corner of the web! I'm on a journey to empower myself and hopefully others through shared courage and compassion. I write Finding Out Fibro, a chronic illness and chronic pain awareness blog that is not just about fibromyalgia, as well as my main passion and only employment, making jewelry and selling gems and crystals under the Etsy shop name MineralismCrystals. Please check me out at the following URL: and share if you can! Thank you for your support! My other hobbies include defeating ableism where I find it, upcycling old junk into funky awesomeness, raising my voice to combat stigma against invisible illness and mental illness, baking and collecting vintage kitchen ware, sharing body-positive messages, playing around in photoshop, abstract painting (especially in neons and metallics!), advocating for those living with chronic illnesses and mental health challenges, seeking safety and upholding visibility for LGBTQIA+ individuals, especially those of us living with physical and mental disabilities. This is my opportunity to do more than just survive with chronic illness. This is me learning how to live well, even though there is no cure for the war my body is waging on me.

8 responses to “Geography Cannot Stop Spoonies From Finding Each Other”

  1. sexyachymoody says :

    I am and always have been a Texas girl!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jessi Finds Out Fibro says :

      Awesome! Thanks for responding! Are you in an urban or a rural part of Texas? I don’t know how you cope with the heat!!! 😀
      Still though, Austin fascinates me with its similarities to Portland. We exchange residents quite freely between the two cities. I think that’s the only place people from Oregon are allowed to move to in Texas, haha. Everyone I know who moved from here goes straight there, and usually doesn’t leave for a long time. And many of my friends here have moved from Austin as well.

      Liked by 1 person

      • sexyachymoody says :

        Oh, I love the heat! I’m in the Houston area. Texas is famously urban and rural at the same time. Everything is far away so it doesn’t really matter if you’re going to the city or the country. They’re likely the same distance lol
        Austin is a wonderful, weird city. I would love to visit Portland. I think I’d fit in well but I would miss the sunshine! 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Moongazer says :

    (((((hugs))))) your blog caught my attention from the very first. You write very powerfully and are very articulate, so make sure you include yourself amongst the spoonie bloggers you describe 😀
    And a perfect example is how you have summed it up so well – a huddling together for warmth 🙂 That is how it feels! And thank the starry skies for it being as it is 😀

    I am from the UK. Originally from Liverpool but now living on the edge of a small historic city 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jessi Finds Out Fibro says :

      Awww, thank you so much for your kind words dear!
      Also, that sounds so cool, to live in a place with history.
      Although I love my home, for it’s geography and plants and for my funky city, Portland.
      🙂 But it is so nice to not be limited to talking to just people in Portland who also have fibro! I am so grateful for you and your authenticity and generous spirit, and those really aren’t things you have to know someone in person to get a sense of. So glad I am sick in the era of the internet, I cannot imagine how desperate I would feel without being able to regularly connect with others who just get it.
      I’m so curious to see pictures of your city, I’m fascinated by all things that have stood the test of time.
      Hope you are having a low pain day, lovely!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Moongazer says :

    I am very glad to know you too, petal 🙂
    You can Google my city if you like – Lincoln. Our cathedral is 1000 years old and there are parts of the Roman wall that are just ‘there’ – you can touch them. It’s a lovely place. Not big like Liverpool but with a good energy and buzz to it, especially since the University was built.
    I used to live a few miles away from Boston, where the Pilgrim Fathers sailed from. Such a shabby little town really. It amazes me that your Boston was named after it – there is no comparison lol.
    But Google Lincoln and have a browse through images of the castle, cathedral, the stonebow, arboretum and the wharf 🙂 Let me know what you think xx


  4. Brain Storm says :

    This is fun! Me: born and raised as a country and city mouse on the coast of Nova Scotia in and around the small peninsula of Halifax. Now in the big smoke, Toronto; a city that I adore and abhor. Gotta get back to the country somehow, someday.

    Liked by 1 person

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