Shocking Pain: A Flare Up In Action
Yesterday I had sciatic nerve pain in combination with whole-body sensory overload, no one could touch me without making me hurt even worse for the beginning of it, and it was so bad, so overwhelming and horrific that I went into shock for almost a half hour, shaking so hard my legs were just jumping around and my teeth were clacking together. My lips and fingers turned blue. My boyfriend offered to take me to the emergency room, which never comes out of his mouth. I think it’s pretty rare when my illness is so visible that it’s not just me talking about how I feel, or moving slowly or with a limp.
I wanted to. I wanted to get wheeled into the ER, but then the thought of having to fight with some gruff doctor who may or may not eventually agree to give me something that may or may not mitigate the pain a little…. I changed my mind. Instead I opted to stay home with my herbal remedies and what prescriptions I have saved from years past and just tough it out. I couldn’t walk without screaming, but I knew I couldn’t stay put forever or I would really lock up. When the first shock-wave struck I actually stayed in one place for four hours because I was alone in the house and afraid of falling. As soon as my boyfriend made it home I made an effort to move as much as possible, screaming and all. Sometimes you gotta make noise and just do what you gotta do.
There were some scary moments, but this is a definite victory. I calmly told everyone around me to let me cry and be miserable and I could probably get through the level 10 pain to something I can manage, like a 9. They listened to me and watched me writhing around and I think they thought I would recant my previous statement and want to go to the ER eventually, but I did not cave!